Starred review from April 4, 2022
In this perceptive and probing work, novelist Hauser (Family of Origin) brilliantly parses the myths that shaped her understanding of love. She glides into the nonfiction realm on the wings of the book’s title essay, which originally ran in the Paris Review in 2019, wherein an ornithological expedition helped Hauser to identify her own needs after a called-off engagement and years of self-abnegation. In the sparkling meditations that rise from it, Hauser gently unravels the “barometer” of happiness that gave her epiphanic moment its power. In “Blood,” she juxtaposes the innocent makings of a 1990s middle school crush with a romantic relationship in 2008 that went a year too long thanks to Barack Obama, who “raised our expectations of what redemptive things were possible.” “Nights We Didn’t” reflects on the growing pains of Hauser’s queerness that “made me dangerous,” while another poignant essay reconciles her desire for motherhood with that of “sexual abandon.” While readers may root for a cathartic ending of self-actualization, Hauser shrewdly argues that, in real life, most years are spent painfully relearning the same lessons. “If you are feeling unsatisfied that I am not tying these threads together for you,” she writes, “ask yourself: Who told you these things went together?” It all adds up to a thrillingly original deconstruction of desire and its many configurations.
Starred review from December 1, 2022
Hauser (Family of Origin) enchants with a gorgeous short essay memoir about love in many forms. Hauser builds off her viral success of the titular story of canceled wedding plans turned bird-watching expedition. Each narrative is so rich with detail and emotional honesty that listeners will surely be enchanted by Hauser's take on life's many messes. Ever the English teacher, Hauser uses literary and cultural texts as a talisman for her personal relationships. Katharine Hepburn in The Philadelphia Story explores self-actualization, the book Rebecca becomes an examination of her current lover's relationship with his ex-wife, Shirley Jones's old house becomes a meditation on her sister's new motherhood, and John Belushi's death is a connection to her late grandmother. Hauser is as charming as she is sensitive, so each story requires listeners to take care and not overdose on emotional rawness. Hauser delivers her sharp sentences delicately with brushes of sardonic wit. The audio is edited without many pauses, so each chapter flows into the other at an uninterrupted pace. VERDICT Nothing short of a marvel, Hauser's writing, combined with stellar narration, creates an exceptional audio experience.--Lizzie Nolan
Copyright 2022 Library Journal, LLC Used with permission.